Will I Ever Not Fall For That?
by Kelaria
Summary: Thor mourns his brother's death – again – only to find out that... Well, you know.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

"How have you been?" Jane asked sympathetically, offering Thor some tea and cookies.

Thor managed an appreciative smile. "All right," he assured her. "Father and I have been doing our best to rebuild, and move on." Things were slowly getting back to normal since the attack on Asgard, but the past month had been the saddest of his life.

"It must be hard, without your mother there," Jane offered gently. "She was an incredible woman."

Thor had been taking a sip of his tea, and gulped it down painfully. "Yes, she was," he agreed, nodding. "Everyone's had stories to tell of her lately," he added, with a sad little laugh. "The whole realm misses her." _But no one ever mentions Loki,_ he thought bitterly. "So – how have you been?" he asked, desperate to change the subject.

"Fine," Jane assured him. She sensed his discomfort, and gave him an understanding smile. "In fact – I have something to show you," she added brightly. "Actually... Some_one,_" she clarified, her brown eyes twinkling. "Hang on, I'll see if he's awake," she said, heading for her bedroom.

_What?_ Thor's eyes widened in confusion. "All right... I'll – wait here," he stammered, his heart sinking as he tried to imagine _who_ was in Jane's bedroom, and whether this month could possibly get any worse.

But he blinked in surprise as she returned a moment later, carrying a small animal cage. "His name is Mr. Squeaky," Jane said, beaming in delight as she set the cage down on the table. "I wasn't planning to get him, but Darcy and I wandered into the pet store the other day, and... Isn't he adorable?"

Thor peered curiously at the tiny white rodent inside the cage. "Yes," he agreed, fascinated. "He's an... Ant? Flea?" he guessed, uncertain.

Jane's brows furrowed. "Mouse," she corrected him, somewhat disturbed. "He's a mouse."

"Ah," Thor nodded, studying the little creature. "He's very... small."

"Isn't he?" Jane agreed brightly. "He probably won't grow much, either. Although he's still a baby," she told him.

Thor smiled; her enthusiasm was infectious, and he pulled her onto his lap, kissing her playfully as they admired her new pet together. "He's perfect," Thor agreed, cuddling Jane close and sighing in gratitude for this brief, happy moment. But then he frowned, confused. "Can I ask you something?"

"What?" Jane asked, smiling in fascination as her mouse ran on its little wheel.

"I've visited one of your pet stores before, and they had – dogs, cats, birds," Thor recalled, his brows furrowing. "But some of them weren't much bigger than Mr. Squeaky, and I'm just wondering – " he broke off, with a baffled gesture. "How do you _ride_ them?"

"What?" Jane gave him a strange look. "Um... you _don't_," she said, sitting back in her own chair and taking a sip of her tea.

"Then why do you keep them?" Thor asked, trying to understand.

"Because they're cute," Jane told him, as if it were obvious. "And lovable."

"No other reason?" Thor asked. "They don't – gather information for you, or... anything?"

Jane frowned. "He's a mouse," she pointed out. "Exactly what sort of information is he supposed to gather?"

"I don't know; my father keeps ravens for that reason," Thor told her. "So is this a human trait?" he asked, peering at her little mouse in curiosity. "To keep pets, even if they can't do anything useful at all?"

"Yes, I suppose," she agreed.

"Hmm." He laughed softly, feeling a twinge of longing. "Well that explains a lot."

Jane gave him a questioning look. "Meaning?"

"Nothing," he apologized, trying to bury his feelings. "It just reminds me of someone, that's all."

"Who?" she asked gently.

"No one," Thor insisted; but then he felt a pang of guilt. "I mean – _someone,_" he admitted helplessly. "Loki," he said, fighting tears. "It reminds me of Loki."

Jane looked down, uncomfortable. "Oh."

"I'm sorry," Thor apologized, sniffing. "I know no one wants to talk about him."

"No, it's all right," Jane assured him, with a sympathetic smile. "He liked... animals?" she asked cautiously.

"Yes," Thor admitted. "When we were younger he was always finding orphaned creatures, and nursing them back to health... Sleipnir, Fenrir, Jörmungandr," he listed off, smiling wistfully at the memory.

"I've read about them," Jane said. "They were his children, right?"

"He called them that," Thor laughed fondly; then he blinked in surprise. "They're mentioned in your books?"

"Yes," Jane told him. "Actually... it says they were _literally_ his offspring," she clarified, her brows furrowing. "That he fathered them. Or – _mothered_ them, in some cases," she added, with a disturbed look.

Thor rolled his eyes. "Sif and the others used to tease him about it, and spread all sorts of stupid rumors," he admitted. "That was a thousand years ago. We were just children." Then he frowned. "So you're saying – the rumors made it all the way to Midgard, and got written down in your books?"

Jane cringed. "Apparently." She gave Thor a hesitant look. "So Loki didn't actually...?"

"What?" he asked, not following.

"Mate with – horses, snakes... rocks?" Jane listed off worriedly.

_Rocks?_ Thor blinked, caught off guard. "He had a pet rock once," he recalled, frowning. _He loved that thing..._ "Volstagg teased him mercilessly for it – aaaghh, I'm going to kill him when I get back," he glowered, incensed. "Does it really say that?"

"Ahh..." Jane cringed apologetically, glancing at her bookshelf.

"No, don't tell me," Thor sighed, shaking his head wearily. "I've got enough problems right now." Then he gave her a regretful look. "I'm sorry," he said, realizing she probably didn't want to hear about his delinquent brother. _No one does._ "I know you don't remember him the way I do."

But Jane's gaze was understanding. "I remember that he saved my life," she said quietly. "I know that if it weren't for him, neither of us would be sitting here today, drinking tea and telling stories," she pointed out, with a sad smile. "I'm grateful for what he did, Thor," she assured him. "Truly, I am."

Thor nodded. "Thank you," he sighed. "I can't talk to Sif and the others about any of this." _They weren't there. They didn't see what he did, in the end._ "You're the only person I know who could possibly understand – what he was _really_ like," he confessed, eyeing her little mouse wistfully.

Jane followed his gaze. "So it's unusual for your people to like animals?" she asked, surprised by the notion.

"We _like_ them," Thor insisted. "I mean – they live in the forest... They're beautiful; we want them to be happy," he agreed. "But if you can't eat them, ride them, or train them to do something useful... No, we generally don't bother with them," he admitted, with a baffled shrug.

"Except for Loki," Jane realized. "Maybe it's a Jotun thing?"

Thor laughed. "It's definitely not a Jotun thing," he told her. "Frost Giants are cold, uncaring, unfeeling... Loki was the opposite of that," he admitted. "He was deeply emotional, annoyingly sensitive..." He laughed fondly, his heart aching. "He cared _too_ much."

"Maybe it's not their nature to be cold-hearted; maybe Jotunheim does it to them," Jane suggested.

"Heh... maybe they all just need a hug," Thor agreed. Then he looked down. "No... We think it was something different, in Loki's case," he admitted quietly.

"What, then?" Jane asked.

"When my father found Loki, on Jotunheim... He truly believed that he was Laufey's son," Thor said. "And I never knew about any of this until recently, but... My parents were never certain who his mother was. The fact that he was far too small for a Jotun baby – the son of a king, yet cast out, and left to die... And all of this happened just weeks after Laufey raided Midgard," he pointed out, sighing uncertainly.

Jane gave him a startled look. "You think his mother was human?"

Thor looked down. "My parents suspected it," he confessed. "He was always small, fragile; _weak_, by our standards," he told her. "As a child he was always getting sick, and could never quite keep up with the rest of us. But then, as he got older – " Thor shook his head, heartbroken.

"What?" Jane asked gently.

Thor sighed, regretful. "He hid it most of the time, behind a mask of false confidence," he told her. "But the last time he let me see him – _really_ see him... He looked awful," Thor confessed, haunted by the image of his brother in the prison cell that day, just over a month ago.

"Awful... as in _human?_" Jane asked, frowning.

"Yes," Thor said. "No," he corrected himself quickly, seeing her indignant look. "No; not like you," he assured her. "He looked – pale, gaunt, tired... But more than that – he looked _old,_" Thor confessed helplessly. "He was my little brother, but in the end, I swear he looked older than me," he said. "And I think he knew it, and it scared him."

"So he was aging faster than you?"

Thor nodded. "For years I tried not to see it. But – yes," he agreed. "A century ago, Loki _definitely_ looked younger than me, but over the past few decades – what?" he broke off, seeing Jane's amused expression.

"A century ago?" Jane laughed. "Sorry, that's just – funny to me," she giggled. "What were you, teenagers?"

Thor frowned. "I suppose."

"Sorry," Jane apologized again. "So what about Frost Giants?" she asked, serious. "How long do they live?"

"Twice as long as Asgardians," he told her. "By Jotun standards, Loki was still only a child."

"Oh." Jane blinked. "So he was a Jotun child, in the body of an aging human...?" She sighed, regretful. "No wonder he had problems," she agreed, giving Thor a look of sympathy. "So you think he knew it?"

"In the end, yes. And I'm sure it was difficult for him," Thor said. "When Loki first learned of his Jotun heritage, he... reacted badly," he reminded her, cringing.

"No kidding," Jane muttered; Loki's identity crisis had culminated in an alien army being unleashed on New York.

"And after that – when I brought him back to Asgard... My father was furious with him," Thor confessed. "He locked him in the dungeon, and forbade me to see him. But my mother visited him every day. And finally she told him of their suspicions: that he was half human, and not _completely_ a monster, as he believed himself to be," he sighed. "At first Loki took it badly, and thought it meant he was cursed to be _weak,_ and _insignificant_, on top of being evil. But in the end Mother thought he was starting to come around, and see the humanity within himself – and that Midgardians are not simply weak and insignificant, but capable of great strength, and honor, and courage," Thor said, giving Jane a fond smile. "And love," he added quietly, gazing at her pet mouse. "In some ways I suspect you know more of it than we do."

"Don't sell yourself short," Jane said, with a teasing smile. "You keep me around, and all I'm good for is getting you into trouble."

"Saving me from boredom is more like it," Thor laughed, pulling her onto his lap again and kissing her affectionately. "Ah, you're not so different from Loki in that way," he confessed. "Though much prettier," he told her, with a tender smile.

Jane returned his adoring gaze. "So can you stay the night?" she asked softly.

"I wish," Thor sighed, stroking her hair. "But we have so much to deal with right now, and I've been worried about my father lately – " He broke off, remembering his _other_ concerns. "I really should get back," he admitted, gently lifting her off his lap as he got up to leave.

"You're worried about your father?" Jane asked, following him to the door. "Why?"

"Ahh..." Thor shook his head. "I haven't the heart to talk about it right now," he apologized, burying his apprehension. "Next time," he promised.

"Next time," Jane repeated, her dark eyes twinkling. "I like the sound of that."

"Hopefully soon," Thor agreed, kissing her goodbye. "Take care of yourself, all right?"

Jane smiled wistfully. "You too."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

"Thor," Sif called out, catching up with him in the hallway.

"Lady Sif," Thor nodded in respectful greeting.

"Where have you been?" Sif asked, frowning; then she guessed, and sighed in annoyance. "Don't answer that," she reproached him. "I need to talk to you," she continued, following him through the hallway. "In private," she added, with a worried look.

_I know what this is about,_ Thor sighed, as he led her into his private chamber. "So," he said, attempting a cheerful smile. "How have things been here?"

"You were gone less than a day, Thor; things are pretty much the same," Sif replied sarcastically, gesturing out the window toward the war-ravaged landscape. "Though you did miss Hogun's birthday party this afternoon," she told him, raising a brow in disapproval.

"Ah – was it today?" Thor asked, cringing apologetically. "I forgot."

"It's all right; he understands," Sif sighed, exasperated. "Though I wish you'd been there," she admitted, blinking disconcertedly. "There was a bit of an – awkward moment," she confessed. "None of us quite knew how to handle it."

"Awkward, as in... How?" Thor asked, though he already knew the answer.

"It was concerning – your father." Sif hesitated. "Thor... We haven't wanted to trouble you, because – I know it's been a bad time," she said, with a sympathetic look. "But we can't help noticing lately that your father's been behaving a bit – strangely," she admitted, uncomfortable.

Thor sighed, looking down. "I know," he agreed quietly. "So what happened?" he asked, feeling a knot in his stomach.

"Mostly just little things," Sif told him gently. "Slight memory lapses; he couldn't seem to remember a story that he'd told us _himself_ – at your own birthday party, just three months ago," she explained, as Thor closed his eyes, his heart sinking. "And then, when it came time for Hogun to blow out his candles – "

"What?" Thor asked.

Sif cringed. "It seems your father ordered _trick_ candles, from a children's novelty shop," she told him. "And you know Hogun: honor, dignity, and formality are very important to him," she admitted, blinking in regret. "But the candles kept going out, and turning back on again – for fifteen minutes straight," Sif laughed, horrified. "It was awful. And your father just sat there with the biggest grin on his face, like it was the funniest joke in the world." She gave Thor a worried look. "It's not like him, to be so childish."

Thor nodded, gazing out the window toward the ravaged city. "I've noticed these things as well," he admitted reluctantly. "He tries to hide it, but – the memory problems, the personality changes..." Thor faced the heartbreaking reality that his father was going senile. "Mother's death was too much for him," he confessed, fighting tears. _I've lost my mother and my brother this past month... And now I'm losing my father too._

He was grateful to feel Sif's hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry, Thor," she said gently.

"I'm sorry too," he said, feeling a pang of guilt. _Mother always wanted to see the two of us wed._ "I know things haven't been the same between us, since – "

"Since you met her," Sif agreed quietly. "I understand, Thor. Perhaps better than you do," she added, with a sorrowful look. "You might have her for fifty years," she warned him gently, pointing out the inevitable. "You'll have me for five thousand."

Thor bowed his head, torn between guilt and grief. "You're too good to me."

"Yes, I am," Sif agreed. Then she blinked, troubled. "Though if you wait too long..."

"What?" Thor asked, surprised. "You like someone?" He wasn't certain whether to feel relieved, or worried.

"No," Sif said. "It's just – " She frowned. "Is it just me, or is Fandral suddenly a lot hotter than he used to be?"

Thor laughed. "You like Fandral?"

"No, I don't," Sif admitted, sighing. "As much as I would sometimes prefer it to be otherwise... There's only one man I love," she confessed, gazing out the window. "And I will wait for him," she insisted quietly. "For as long as it takes." Then she looked down, uncomfortable. "Anyway – your father will be wanting to talk to you," she informed him. "He's commissioning a new statue of your grandfather to replace the one you broke, and – " She sighed, at a loss. "He insists _this_ one ought to be nude. With a fountain coming out of his – " Sif cringed, giving Thor a pleading look.

Thor blinked, disturbed. "All right; I'll try to talk him out of it," he agreed, as Sif took her leave, heading for the doorway. "And Sif," he called after her. She turned back, giving him a questioning look. "I really do – care for you, my Lady," he stammered, apologetic.

Sif sighed, nodding unhappily before hurrying away.

_That went well,_ Thor thought morosely, gazing after her. _My heart can't take this right now._

"Trouble in paradise?" came a familiar voice behind him.

Thor turned around, staring in disbelief as a shadowy figure emerged from behind the curtain nearby. "Father," he exclaimed, wide-eyed. "What are you doing – how did you... How long have you been there?" he blurted out, caught off guard.

Odin gave him a disapproving look. "Long enough to hear that you disagree with my plans to replace your grandfather's statue."

Thor bowed his head in respect. "Father – it's not that we disagree with the idea in general, it's just... Perhaps the fountain is a bit much – "

_"HUUAAAARRRGHHHH!"_ Odin yelled, silencing him with a stern gesture. "I am King of Asgard," he declared. "And I will have my fountain! Is that understood?"

Thor gulped. "Yes, Father," he nodded meekly.

"Good," Odin said, looking out the window. He scowled, troubled. "And I'm _not_ senile."

"No – of course not," Thor stammered. "I never meant – Father, I'm sorry."

Odin sighed, gazing out across the ravaged city of Asgard. "But I will need your help," he admitted grudgingly. "If we are to get through another month of this."

Thor nodded. "Of course, Father," he agreed. "Anything you need – anything at all," he promised. "I'll be here."

"You'd better be." Odin gave him a reproachful look. "I _tried_ to hand the throne over to you three weeks ago – because I knew this was going to happen," he grumbled, staring back out the window. "But no... You insisted there was no better king than me, and – now look at the mess we're in," he muttered, frustrated.

Thor felt a pang of guilt, realizing he'd ruined his father's attempt to step down with dignity and grace. "I'm sorry, Father," he apologized again. "I didn't understand. And I wish you'd told me the truth," he admitted, heartbroken. "Father... How long has your memory been failing you?" he asked gently.

Odin scowled, indignant. "My memory isn't failing me," he insisted; then he sighed in frustration. "The reason I don't remember these things is because I wasn't there," he told Thor, with an exasperated gesture.

Thor nodded unhappily, realizing his father's dementia was even worse than he'd thought. _Mother's death was too much for him. But he'll be with her soon,_ he realized, managing a reassuring smile as he gazed at his father affectionately. The familiar lines in his face had grown even deeper this past month, and his pure white hair seemed wispier than he remembered...

Odin rolled his eyes, annoyed by Thor's insipid staring. "Don't look at me like that."

"I didn't – I wasn't – " Thor broke off, staring in confusion as the lines in his face began to fade, his hair growing long and dark, as his stocky form became youthful and slender... Thor's heart pounded in alarm as he realized the green-clad figure smirking back at him wasn't his father at all.

It was Loki.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

"Loki!" Thor exclaimed, shocked and confused. _How are you alive?_ But his relief quickly turned to annoyance, frustration, and concern for his father's safety. "What have you done with him?" he demanded angrily, shoving him against the wall.

"Nothing," Loki insisted, giving Thor a wounded look. "He's all right. He fell into the Odinsleep, a month ago. I've merely been filling in for him."

Thor glared at him, exasperated. "And how exactly did he fall into the Odinsleep?" It typically happened when their father was under stress, and more often than not, his delinquent brother was the cause of it.

"I came to him a month ago, pretending to be a guard," Loki explained, as Thor grudgingly released his stranglehold. "I told him that I – that _Loki_ was dead, and that we'd found the body," he said, as Thor glowered, keeping a close eye on him. "I was about to leave, and just _get out_ of here, but then – " Loki gestured. "He collapsed, as if..."

Thor sighed wearily. "As if the news of your death grieved him."

Loki looked down. "I suppose. Anyway – it was a bad time," he pointed out. "You were on Midgard; Asgard was in ruins... The people needed stability, not for their king to be napping," he said, defensive. "So I – " He sighed, gesturing at himself. "It's only temporary, until he wakes up."

Thor shook his head, baffled as always by his brother's method of handling things. "Father's all right, then?" he asked. "You're sure?"

"Yes, he's fine. I've been checking on him a dozen times a day," Loki said, annoyed by the whole situation.

"So you've been pretending to be king, all this time? How did you get back from – " Thor broke off, remembering the last time he'd seen his brother, on Svartalfheim. "Are you sure you're all right?" he asked, concerned. "I saw – "

Loki rolled his eyes. "Come, brother. You can't believe everything you see."

Thor laughed quietly, realizing his death had only been an illusion. "I should have known."

Loki's eyes twinkled impishly. "In any case, I can't wait for Father to wake up," he sighed. "I always thought I wanted to be king. But after a month of it... It's really boring," he told Thor, scowling. "You're expected to behave in a certain way, and... Things have to get done," he admitted reluctantly, glancing out the window toward the ravaged city. "You have to be responsible, and – predictable... I hate predictable," Loki muttered, sulking.

Thor suppressed a laugh. _You are impossible._ "So when Father wakes up – and finds out you've commissioned a urinating Bor fountain... What's your plan here, Loki?"

Loki sighed, frustrated. "Getting locked up again, I suppose."

"I'll put in a good word for you," Thor reassured him. "Father wants to forgive you. He's just stubborn," he told his brother. "Before, when he put you in the dungeon – he said that if you wanted to be treated like a proper Asgardian prince, you needed to start behaving like one."

"That's just it. I don't want to," Loki retorted. "I never asked for any of this," he said, furrowing his brows. "It's not who I am."

"It _is_, Loki," Thor said.

"It's not," Loki protested. "And if that's what you think, you may as well throw me back in the dungeon, because having to behave like a 'proper Asgardian prince' is a prison sentence in itself," Loki sulked. "I'm not an Asgardian prince. You know perfectly well what I am," he added, a tone of bitterness in his voice.

"I do," Thor agreed. "Half of you is a Jotun child, throwing an epic tantrum," he admitted, sighing in commiseration. "But the other half is human," he added gently. "And if you haven't noticed, I seem to have a weak spot for humans."

"Weak," Loki repeated bitterly. "You speak of it as if it's a good thing," he reproached him. "What would you know of weak?"

Thor looked down, sighing. "When Father banished me to Midgard... I was human, for all intents and purposes," he reminded his brother. "And I lasted less than a minute on that planet – before I was bested by a girl, and ended up in the hospital," he confessed, with an embarrassed laugh.

Loki smirked, surprised and delighted. "I didn't know that."

"Well, now you do," Thor said, smiling sympathetically. "And I learned that true strength is not having everything handed to you, because it's your birthright," he consoled his brother. "True strength is what you find within yourself – when all of that is taken away."

Loki blinked unhappily, staring out the window.

"Loki, I know you've been going through a difficult time, ever since you found out about – " Thor gestured to him, sighing. "And I forgive you," he said. "Because I'm a fool, and you can trick me a thousand times, and I'll still love you," he admitted helplessly. "You're not nearly as terrible as you try to make everyone believe you are," he assured him; then he sighed wearily. "But sometimes you make it difficult, Loki. You really do."

Loki nodded, looking down. "I'm sorry."

"Are you?" Thor asked, frustrated and concerned. "Do you even understand, little brother, that sometimes your tricks go too far?"

"They don't always turn out the way I mean for them to," Loki conceded grudgingly. "But I've never meant to hurt you, Thor. I promise you that."

"You've never meant to hurt me?" Thor repeated, baffled. "Such as the time I was banished to Midgard, and you told me that Father was dead, that Mother forbade my return – and then you sent a Destroyer to kill me? _That_ is your idea of 'never meaning to hurt me'?"

Loki scowled, resentful. "Fine, I'm a monster then," he agreed. "Believe what you want."

"I want to believe you, Loki," Thor sighed. "I just can't understand... Why did you do it?" he asked, his voice betraying his pain.

Loki rolled his eyes. "Classic surprise party trick," he told him.

Thor's brows furrowed. "What?"

Loki sighed. "I told you that Father was dead, and that no one wanted you back – to put you in a sad mood... So that when I _fixed_ everything, and convinced Father to bring you back home – the surprise would be all the better," he explained, as if it were obvious.

"A surprise party?" Thor repeated in disbelief. "Honestly?"

"Yes," Loki said. "I figured it was the least I could do, after what happened at your coronation," he added, with a guilty frown.

_My coronation?_ "The Frost Giants," Thor realized, staring at him. "You let them in?"

Loki squirmed uncomfortably under his interrogation. "Yes."

"Why?" Thor asked, utterly baffled.

"As a present for you," Loki insisted, defensive. "I wanted to give you something memorable; a glorious victory to celebrate."

Thor sighed. "You have a strange choice in gifts, brother."

"Like I said: it didn't go entirely as planned," Loki grumbled. "But honestly – the surprise party was supposed to make up for it."

Thor furrowed his brows, trying to make sense of all this. "If you were planning a surprise party... Why did you send a Destroyer to kill me?"

"I didn't send it to _kill_ you," Loki told him, exasperated. "I merely ordered it to ensure that you didn't return – until I had everything ready, for your party," he said, furrowing his brows. "I just needed it to keep you busy for a few hours."

"Loki..." Thor sighed in frustration. "So when I got back to Asgard – for my _party_," he continued, giving his brother a reproachful look. "Trying to destroy Jotunheim? Making threats against Jane? Those were your gifts to me as well?"

"Yes," Loki insisted; then he blinked unhappily. "Everything had gone wrong that day, and I knew _I_ was going to be blamed for it," he said childishly, as if that were somehow unfair. "I realized no one would ever believe me – and that Father would take _your_ side, as always," he grumbled. "Everyone hated me, and – I just wanted to die," Loki confessed, helpless. "So I was trying to get you to kill me, as my final gift to you," he said morosely. "A glorious victory over your traitorous monster of a brother."

"Loki... That's not what you are," Thor assured him quietly.

"Is it not?" Loki retorted, bitter.

"No," Thor insisted. "You're not a monster, Loki. You're just – a terrible party planner," he conceded, with a sad laugh. "But that's no reason to throw yourself off a bridge," he chided him, glancing out at the rainbow bridge. "After you fell... What happened? Mother said you would never speak of it," Thor admitted, trying to understand. "You were tortured, weren't you?" he asked, his heart aching at the realization.

Loki scowled. "It doesn't matter."

"It does matter," Thor said. "It matters to me." _You're my baby brother, Loki. Annoying or not, I can't bear the thought of you being tortured._ "When you turned up on Midgard, a few months later – I could see it in your eyes," he told him gently. "You weren't yourself, Loki. You were being controlled – just like Selvig, and the others."

Loki's brows furrowed in resentment. "Only weak-minded people can be controlled."

"Which is why when you tried to stab me in the heart – you missed by at least four inches," Thor pointed out, with an affectionate smile. "You were trying to fight it, Loki." _And I love you for it._

Loki sighed. "It's all just a haze," he admitted, blinking. "I barely remember what happened. But – I'm sorry," he said, giving Thor a remorseful look.

Thor nodded reassuringly. "I believe you, little brother."

"That's because you're a gullible fool," Loki sighed in annoyance.

Thor smiled. "I am."

"I could be lying, you know," Loki reproached him. "About all of this."

"You saved my life on Svartalfheim," Thor countered quietly. "That was no lie; that was real. For all your tricks, Loki... When it really matters, you've always been there for me," he told him. "You're not half the monster you pretend to be."

Loki sighed dismally, gazing out the window. "I doubt that Father will see it that way."

"Give him time," Thor said.

"Oh, I intend to," Loki agreed emphatically.

Thor's brows furrowed. "What do you mean?"

"Come, brother," Loki chided him. "Do you really think I'm going to let him lock me back up, until I'm ready to behave like a 'proper Asgardian prince'? It's not who I am, Thor. It never will be," he said, scowling. "As soon as he wakes up – I'll be out of here."

"You're leaving?" Thor gave him a worried look. "Loki... Where will you go? What is your plan?"

Loki smirked mischievously. "If I told you, it wouldn't be a surprise, now would it?"

_Aaagghh..._ "I'm serious, Loki – "

"No, _I'm_ serious, Thor," Loki countered. "Look at me," he said quietly. "_Really_, look at me," he said, dropping the subtle illusion for a moment, and letting Thor see the pale, hollow gauntness of his face, the fine lines surrounding his eyes, and a lifetime's worth of scars which had never healed quite as well as they should have. "You know what I am," Loki said, his expression filled with self-pity. "And you know that my life is half over – "

"Loki, it's not as bad as that," Thor said, refusing to fall for his drama.

"_Nearly_, then," Loki said, pouting. "With any luck I still have a few good millennia left in me," he conceded grumpily. "But I refuse to spend them stuck here, in a role that I've failed at all my life," he insisted, scowling. "I finally have my chance at true freedom – to travel the nine realms, and do what _I_ want to do, instead of what everyone else expects of me – and I'm taking it, Thor," he declared. "Are you going to try to stop me?"

"Yes," Thor told him stubbornly. "Because it's my job, and – I don't want you to go," he confessed, his heart sinking at the thought. _I'd worry about you, little brother. I'd worry about ALL of us._ "Though I'll probably fail," he sighed heavily. "Just – watch out for yourself," he implored his brother. "Don't get in too much trouble."

Loki blinked, as if confused. "Define 'too much' – "

"I'm serious, Loki," Thor warned him. "Don't make me come after you."

Loki sighed. "Fine," he agreed, giving Thor a reproachful look, as if wounded by his lack of confidence.

It was the half-hearted promise of a mischievous Jotun child; but it was the only assurance Loki was capable of giving him, so it would have to do. _If he stays out of trouble for three weeks, I'll count myself lucky,_ Thor decided, giving his brother a wistful smile. "Don't be a stranger, all right?"

"Oh, I'll be many strangers," Loki assured him, with an impish grin. Then he rolled his eyes. "Don't worry, I'll stop by now and then. And I'm not the only one with a talent for getting into trouble," he added defensively. "More than likely _I'm_ the one who's going to have to come after _you_."

Thor laughed fondly. "I pray that you're right."

"In the meantime..." Loki sighed, casting a baleful glance toward the King's quarters. "Father shows no signs of waking up anytime soon," he warned him. "It looks as though you're stuck with me for a little while longer."

Thor gave his brother an appreciative smile. "Good," he said, grateful for this brief time together. "Let him sleep."


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

"Jane," Thor said, embracing her and giving her a tender kiss. "Are you all right?" he asked gently.

"Yes, I'm fine," Jane assured him cheerfully. "How are you?"

Thor smiled in quiet sympathy; he knew Jane wasn't as 'fine' as she claimed to be, but understood that she wasn't ready to talk about it yet, and was probably grateful for the distraction. _I felt the same way after Mother died. _

"Oh, I've been good," Thor said, following her into the kitchen as she began to make some tea. "Things are getting back to normal. My grandfather's new statue was unveiled last week," he told her, as they shared an amused smile. He'd told her about his brother's asinine plan, but in the end Loki had grudgingly agreed to replace their grandfather's statue with an exact replica of the original.

"And your father?" Jane asked, hopeful.

"Slowly regaining his dignity," Thor said, laughing. Odin had awakened from his sleep two weeks ago; he was exasperated by Loki's childish antics, but realized he couldn't punish someone who was officially dead. And although he refused to admit it, Thor knew his father was quietly grateful that Loki was all right.

"How is Loki doing?" Jane asked.

"He seems to be behaving himself so far," Thor said, with a fond smile. "If he's gotten into trouble, I haven't heard about it. In fact I saw him just this morning," he told her. "He stopped by to wish me a happy Springflower Day."

"Springflower Day?" Jane asked, smiling in curiosity. "You have a holiday to celebrate flowers?"

"Yes," Thor nodded. "Actually just one specific flower: the Springflower," he explained. "It only blooms for one day, out of the whole year. We keep one at the palace; it's over ten thousand years old. So every year we hold a traditional ceremony, to watch it bloom," he told her. "It slowly opens, and blooms for a few hours, before the petals fall off, one by one," he said. "It's a very special event."

"It sounds fascinating," Jane agreed. "And beautiful," she added, smiling wistfully.

"Actually, it's really boring," Thor sighed. "It's a ten-hour ceremony, and we just have to sit there watching it, in a hall of a thousand people. Even with front row seats you can barely see the flower anyway. It's the most painfully boring thing ever," he laughed, apologetic. "Loki and I had to suffer through it every year as children. So he stopped by to gloat this morning, before taking off again," Thor told her, rolling his eyes.

Jane giggled; but then her brows furrowed. "Wait... If there's a ten-hour ceremony today – what are you doing here?"

Thor gave her a concerned look. "Heimdall pulled me out of the ceremony," he told her gently. "He said he'd seen you crying, and that – I'm so sorry, Jane," he said, taking her hand. "I know he was like family to you – your own child, and that you must be devastated," he sighed, bowing his head. "I came right away."

Jane blinked in confusion. "What are you talking about?"

Thor frowned. "Heimdall told me it looked as though your pet mouse had passed away."

"What?" Jane exclaimed, horrified. "No no no no..." She ran to her bedroom, as Thor followed, concerned. "Mr. Squeaky?" Jane asked worriedly, hurrying over to his cage. Hearing her voice, the little white mouse lifted his head up, his whiskers twitching inquisitively. "He's fine – he's all right," Jane sighed in relief, pulling him out of his cage and holding him gently. "Oh, Mr. Squeaky, don't scare me like that," she said, kissing him on the head. But then she blinked worriedly. "So – does Heimdall see the future?" she asked, holding Mr. Squeaky protectively.

"No," Thor told her, confused. "He said it happened just this morning."

Jane frowned. "This morning I was having coffee with Darcy and Erik."

"And you weren't crying?" Thor asked. "About anything?"

"No," Jane told him. "We were laughing."

"Why would Heimdall lie to me?" Thor wondered, baffled. "And pull me out of an official ceremony, for no reason?" Now that he thought about it, Heimdall had looked somehow – _off_ – and although he had tried to keep his expression somber, there had been a mischievous spark in his golden eyes...

"Because it wasn't Heimdall," Thor realized, laughing quietly.

"What?" Jane asked.

Thor smiled fondly; there was only one other person who could possibly have known – or cared – about Mr. Squeaky. "It was a Springflower Day present from Loki," he told Jane, touched by his brother's thoughtfulness. "To save me from the most boring day of the year." _He loves me..._

Jane gave him a confused look. "So you're saying – Loki pretended to be Heimdall, and told you Mr. Squeaky was dead... As a _present_ to you?"

"Yes," Thor agreed, smiling in amusement. _Will I ever not fall for that?_

**The End**


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